Tons of things happened since the first day I started in university and guess what? I'm already on my 4th term; means 4 terms to go until I get the title of Bachelor of Arts!


As you may know I took the Dutch Studies in uni. It's not the major that I wanted when I was in high school but faith dragged me here, so I believe everything happens for a reason. 

A little bit flashback...

Tadinya gue sangat mengidam-idamkan buat jadi Diplomat. You know that kind of ambitious, independent, smart yet intelligent woman who can help Indonesian in other countries, moving to one country to another just trying and hoping that she can bring the peaces, share the happiness, never hesitate to give a hand for others and absolutely to give the contribution to this amazing country.


I'm sure that kind of thought masih nempel di otak gue sampe sekarang, not 100% but I still imagine it sometimes. Sayangnya dengan segala macam pertimbangan, I had to give up on that one. Kalau sesuai rencana yang udah gue tulis selama di bangku sekolah dengan judul "Bucket List/Future Plan In 10 Years" harusnya gue sekarang kuliah dengan major International Relations/International Studies to achieve that dream. The Education System in Indonesia just unbearable and it brought me to my major now and I had to work on my Plan B.

I had this belief that we can reach our dreams and make it happens in so many ways. It won't be easy, tapi selama kita punya niat yang cukup dan a little bit of ambition, then everything's gonna be fine.

"When there's will, there's hope."  
So I came up with my other plan to reach my dream. Dengan mimpi buat bisa kerja di luar negeri, I finally took this major. I found this major a bit interesting because there's not many people who can speak this language, but in fact there are still a lot of things to do between Indonesia and the Netherlands. Besides having the ability to speak more than one or two language is a big thing in the Curriculum Vitae (right?).

Sayangnya ngga semua yang kita harapkan sesuai ekspektasi. So it turned out that I'll learn every little specific history about the country, especially the literature. I don't really mind about the literature, but a BIG NO sama sejarah. Sedikit curcol, on my last term I had this class called The Development to Dutch Literature and I had to remember all of  it even everything before the World War. It's just I'm not so good with History. Thank God, I passed this one meskipun dengan nilai yang cukup if you know what I mean he hehe.

Move to the next part, 

I realise with this major only, I can't work in the place that I want, I can't reach that dream. I need to learn more about it and I need to improve the skills that needed to work in there. So I decided to join in some organisations to develop them.

I decided to join several organisations to understand the environment in university and knowing more about my passion itself. In this age, everything seems so fun dan rasanya pengen ikut atau nyoba ini itu. I think it's really fine because it will open my mind and wide my networking. After having some experiences in those organisations, I finally came up with Education, Leadership, and Global Sustainable Development Goals kind of things.

I'm not into Arts or Sports although I am the Arts Student, yet a perfect candidate to enjoy it. So I join this International Youth Leadership Organisation called AIESEC (Association Internationale des Étudiants en Sciences Économiques et Commerciales) or in English means International Association of Students in Economic and Commercial Science I think I will tell more about it in my other post since it could take hours to explain what it is exactly and what my role in there.


The other one is called GUIM (Gerakan UI Mengajar) where I'm still not lucky enough to be the teacher for the children out there. The process is so long, like 4 or 5 stages and I always failed on the second stage. I'm still gonna do it as long as I'm a student in this university, failure can't really stop me to doing this for the Indonesian children.

Finally we come to the last part of this post and it's gonna be about how my dream is slowly changing...

I am 19 and considered as a teenagers, not really an adult which means I'm still craving for new adventures, some challenging things, exploring new things, and stuff. A year and a half in university, facing the classes with the people and having influences from the organisation that I'm joining in, changed my mind a bit. 

Diplomat is a great job for sure, but considering myself as a woman who's soon in 5 years having a children and a husband to taken care of, doesn't look so great anymore. I don't want to traveling the world so often and leaving my family behind. Then I found the other awesome job with the same goals that I have in my mind. It could be working in International Companies, Non-Governmental Organisations, Broadcasting, or even having my own business. I can still going abroad for couple days while having some people to taken care of.

I don't know what I'll have in my mind in the next several months, but I hope it's still with the same thought to help and be useful for the others especially people in my age. Just like the AIESEC's Motto,

"Empowering young people for peace and fulfillments of Humankind's Potential." 
It's been like a long time since the last time I post something in this blog and I had like tons of stories to tell. So I guess a classic love story would be nice...?

As you may know that having a long-term kind of relationship wasn't really my type for the last couple years. I already had some new ex's on my second year, that's pretty bad because I hate short-term relationship. That's why I decided to keep myself busy on my 3rd semester. 

I wasn't only took full credit for that semester, but I also active in the organisation to expand my networking. I thought meeting new people and having new friends would open my mind more. Gladly it's 100% true that I became more open-minded these days. Not only that, I also met someone who become my boyfriend right now.  It's cray cray, isn't it?

I didn't have any intention to seeing someone that time. I find it's funny because I was so picky when it comes to my type of boyfriend. After I thought I had a perfect relationship with my last ex which it was not, then I have a new relationship with someone in 3 months. I admit that it was a pretty fast decision that I made that day but it's also the best decision so far.

So this is how the story begins,

I have a position as the International Relations Officer in the organisation that I'm join in. My job is to help those people who joined the volunteer program. Shortly I had 4 people to taken care of. One day around 5 PM I held the first meeting with one of them. 

Lemme introduce you with him. He's Gilang, majoring Management in the same university as I am. We had a couple funny nice convos and I could say that we're not only having the IR Officer and the client relationship, but we're also friends. 

Until he introduced me to one of his high school friends who's also majoring Management but in the different university. At first I wasn't interested at all and I was like complaining so much about him to Gilang. I forgot when it was exactly, but I stressed so much on that week because I had tons of things to do. Then I decided to meet up with him.

We met on Thursday and like the other usual first date, we went to one of the malls in Jakarta. I talked a lot and shared all my stress to him haha. I wasn't even thinking about my impression because I had no intention to dating him. Strangely after we had an awkward dinner and another chit chat accompanied by a cup of coffee, he's still into me. 

He asked 'it' while we're watching a movie. I shocked a bit because I didn't want a relationship at that time. However, my heart said something different and I didn't want to be a jerk like what I did before; being close with someone and then dump that person right away when he wants a serious relationship with me. Anyway don't do that ever, karma does exist lol.

My first thought at that time is,

"Tyara, here we go again

As usual, I predicted that I'll have the same relationship like before, the short-term one which never last after a month. So I just crossed my finger and hope that I won't be too in love with this one, so I won't be too broken heart in the end.

However, love's not allowed me to be like that. I believe that love has its way to make something impossible to be possible. I'm just so glad and thankful that we're not in one-sided love kind of relationship.

Since that day, I've been through so many happy-good times that I've never had before. 




I cried at the first time I realised he's so serious about me. That he put real efforts into me. Now I realised that love can't be predicted or be planned. It's just happened that way and it's my turn to be thankful what I've already got until that day and take care of the decision that I made.
I believe the first thing that pop up in everyone's mind ketika life goes so wrong adalah.. Kenapa?


Kenapa harus gue?
Kenapa gue orangnya?
Kenapa gue yang diginiin?
Kenapa lagi-lagi kayak gini?
Kenapa harus kejadian kayak gini?

...and the other kenapa yang ngga akan pernah ada abisnya.

It's just like me, I tend to blame on the situation, blame on other people, or blame on myself for bad things that happened to me. These days I asked so many questions to my mind about everything that happened to my life, whether it's my mistake, my failure, or maybe it's actually my destiny which I have to be grateful for.

That moment of break-up always made me said "Kenapa?"

I admit how unlucky I am when it comes to love. Some people said that I haven't met my true love yet which I don't even really believe if it exist but I know I will understand about that one in the future. It's just I feel like I always met the wrong person, wrong because there's too much differences. Salah satunya adalah beda keyakinan, susah kan tuh? No matter how many times gue tanya kenapa, cuma Tuhan yang tau jawabannya. So I prefer to give up on that one.

Another moment of having a crush on someone also made me said "Why?"

Yap, selera gue soal this creature called man bisa dibilang quiet complicated dan bikin gue frustasi sendiri kenapa selera gue super unreachable. Di sisi lain I don't want to be a single woman for the rest of my life, tho I'm a bit feminist. I'm not even looking for a kind of very handsome and rich man, just someone who's smart enough with a great potential. 

The moment when I realize I'm studying language and literature in university made me said "Kenapa?!"

I know I never told about the story behind my hopelesness kuliah sastra setelah 12 tahun lebih menempuh pendidikan dengan matematika yang bikin kepala sakit, ekonomi yang bikin gue super kritis, sosiologi yang bikin gue peka, dan pelajaran-pelajaran lain yang bikin gue super ambis dari SD sampe SMA. Ngga pernah terbayangkan sebelumnya gue belajar sesuatu yang ternyata sangat bukan gue (ngga separah kalo gue kuliah ilmu keperawatan, kedokteran, atau mipa) but it always made me said why.

The last moment that I can think of that made me said "Kenapa??"

Definitely this one... ngga ada yang lebih mengganggu hidup gue selain mendengar pertanyaan-pertanyaan semacam;

"Kok malming ngga pergi?"
"Kok ngga ada yang jemput?"
"Kok ngga ada yang ke rumah?"
"Cantik banget, mau pergi sama siapa?"
"Cewek kayak lo masih aja single, ngga salah nih?"

Dan gue pun cuma bisa bilang kenapa...

Tapi terkadang kata kenapa tercipta untuk ngga selalu dijawab, at least it works to avoiding hal-hal yang ngga mau gue jawab atau cuma supaya I feel much way better karena ujung-ujungnya gue cuma akan bilang because God knows me the best and He can't be wrong.
I just went to this restaurant and I just want to say how good it was! Yes, it called "Tokugawa". As you can see from its name, this restaurant has a specialty in okonomiyaki (that yummy Japanese food which tastes like Takoyaki). 

Tokugawa ini turns out udah ada sejak 50 tahun yang lalu di Jepang. They have 2 kind of okonomiyaki which are Kansai dan Hiroshima style. Nah bedanya dari okonomiyaki yang lain, you can order any kind of okonomiyaki with beef, chicken, or seafood and you also can add any topping that you like such as cheese, noodle, or extra beef, chichken, and seafood.

Mereka juga jual many kind of teppanyaki beside that okonomiyaki itself, but so far Tokugawa ini mostly selalu rame karena okonomiyakinya! Ohiya, they also serve the okonomiyaki in a hot plate which is beda banget dari okonomiyaki di tempat lain. 


That time I ordered a Tokugawa Style Okonomiyaki with Octopus (Extra Cheese). Tokugawa ini ada di bagian Food Culture bareng sama another Japanese Restaurants, jadi supaya ngga perlu bolak-balik ngeliatin punya kita udah jadi atau belum, mereka punya beeper yang bakalan bunyi kalau pesenan kita udah jadi. I find it much way simpler and more convenience too.

When I taste this okonomiyaki, it was really good actually. Guritanya super big and chewy and yummy, also the extra cheese made it more delicious. The size for one portion is enough for 2 people. I could say it's a better style of okonomiyaki for sure. The price is quite expensive but worth it tho. Mine was around 65-70k with the extra cheese that costs 10k, so the total around 80k including the tax.


I definitely recommend this one, beside the place is nice too. It located in AEON Mall, Ground Floor inside the Food Culture. Try to visit and have a taste!
18 Going On 19? Yeah that's how I describe my age right now.

I'm 18 years old now and turning 19 on July. I'm not sure if I should be happy or not but when I was little I was waiting the day when I'm considered as an adult because it looks like I could do anything by myself.

Well...

That's true anyway, but what I feel right now is so damn different. I feel like, "Wait.. what? I'm 18 and this year I'm 19 years old already? You gotta be kidding me."

I think time flies too fast, next year I'm no longer in a group of 10's but 20's! It's not like I'm not happy with my age right now, but whoaa I never realize how fast it is.

Anyway there's no time to stress over it, life goes on and I'm going to enjoy my precious time for being an-18-year-old-girl :)

So this time I'm going to share how I spent my days when I was 18 before literally turning 19, hope you enjoy!

I turned 18 on July so I already passed those days when I was studying so hard every second of my life to face my National Exam, graduated from High School, and going to one of the best university in my country

All of them happened when I was 17 and I never expect my 18 would be much better because it's my first year in university and I have to adapt with the new environment which is something I hate the most, you know, that awkward feeling, those very new things, and I know it would take so much effort and wouldn't be easy

But this quote proves something,

"Don't expect too much because that too much will hurt you so much."

I never expect something good will happen. Indeed when you're not expecting too much, you won't be disappointed. You'll be more grateful with every little things that happen in your life, and that's what really happened in my 18.

I'm officially become a student in Faculty of Humanities on August and I started my study on September. Surprisingly.. since that month I made so many beautiful memories.

1st!

New people, new friends, new personality, that I never met before. I know how I hate to adapt but wait, it turned out really exciting. I met hundred new friends with;

Very different backgrounds

Very different personalities

Even from another countries

From 1 to 20 years older than me


And that's amaaazing. I had conversations that contain the new ways of thinking and my brain had so much fun by finding out so many awesome facts that really exist in this world.



2nd!

New experiences; as you know being a freshman in university after graduated from a couple months ago... is hard!

That transition made me tired, moving to the apartment and living by myself and my roommate, so far we survived. I passed through those bad times and university life is really challenging. There were also good experiences that I couldn't explain because there are too many but so far those experiences made me stronger than before which is a good thing :)



3rd!

Speaking, Listening, Reading, Writing, and stuff.

I have no intention to studying literature at all. I'm a very social person who likes to speak so much and I'm really not an art person who can memorizing things like Vocabulary, but finding me in this faculty and studying literature...

Well that's not that bad, it challenges me to know the new world beside of those rational and logic things, being simple and not overthinking of something is somehow feels so good. As long as I'm good at grammar and stuff, I think I'll survive lol :)


4Th!

Togetherness...

Being together with the same people until 00.00 for a couple months is really unbelievable but great. You didn't know each other very well but the condition said the opposite, not all of those days were great. Some of them were so bad but there was a couple days when I laughed, I smiled, and I was happy even though I have like a dozen problems on that day.. and that happened because of them.



So that's my 18, how's yours? 
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